‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ (2014) review: No pizza for you!

Megan Fox rocked; everything else, not so much

Look, I’m disappointed. I’m just going to get this out of the way right now. You know how I know I’m disappointed? I was impressed with Megan Fox’s performance. There, I said it. Moving on.

I can’t in any right say I’m a “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” fanboy. I watched the cartoon and the three movies from the 1990s. I can’t say I was terribly enamored, but I enjoyed them regardless. So, a dose of nostalgia streamed through my system as I prepared to watched the first live-action TMNT film since 1993. I wouldn’t say I was donning rose-colored glasses, but I was expecting entertainment. You know what I got?

Boredom. Just pure, unadulterated boredom. The kind of boredom where, even though you’re wearing 3-D glasses, you still check your phone to read your email. (That will kill you eyes; don’t do it.) That’s until a blast of computer animation assaults your optics with the actual introduction of our bipedal heroes in a half-shell.

Click here to read the full review at TDN.com.

One “Where’s the Cowabunga?’ star out of five.

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From left, Raphael, Michelangelo, Leonardo, and Donatello are shown in a scene from "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles." (Photo credit: AP photo by Paramount Pictures, Industrial Light & Magic)

From left, Raphael, Michelangelo, Leonardo, and Donatello are shown in a scene from “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.” (Photo credit: AP photo by Paramount Pictures, Industrial Light & Magic)

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